Last week, two of my team members were horrified to read about a new law that the Taliban have passed in Afghanistan, making it illegal for women to speak outside of their homes because their voices are “potential instruments of vice”. This is part of the country’s first vice and virtue laws, which also include public executions and flogging for women who do not conceal their voice, face and body, or are seen looking at a male who is not a relative.
What horrified my colleagues more than the actual Taliban laws, was the fact that these laws had been passed almost three months previously, and no-one was talking about it. No-one (including myself) knew about it.
Why was that? Is it because Afghanistan feels far away? Is it because the Taliban is alien to us, with almost zero probability of impacting us directly? Is it because we don’t know anyone from Afghanistan? Is it someone else’s problem in a land far, far away?
What if we looked at this differently? What if we considered every single one of those Afghani women as a fellow human being. What if we imagined having a sister in Afghanistan? What then? Might then the horrific circumstances they are in feel closer to home? How can we feel more empathy for these women, and increase not only their daughters’ chances of a better future, but those of our own children too.
It’s time to get curious.
Empathy and compassion—two key components of meaningful human connections—are naturally fostered through curiosity. Positive psychology emphasises the importance of compassion in achieving both personal and social well-being, and curiosity is a key enabler.
How?
Breaking Down Bias and Stereotypes: Curiosity disrupts stereotypes by encouraging us to learn more about individuals as unique people rather than making assumptions based on preconceptions. According to Carol Dweck’s research on growth mindset, those who view their understanding of others as fluid rather than fixed are more open to learning about others’ lived experiences and seeing beyond surface-level judgments.
Fostering Shared Humanity: Approaching others with curiosity about their experiences fosters a sense of shared humanity. Through curiosity, we begin to see the world through the eyes of others, developing a sense of compassion as we recognise common struggles, hopes, and dreams. This understanding is critical to creating stronger, more compassionate societies, workplaces, and relationships.
Encouraging Pro-social Behaviours: Curiosity can also be a motivating force for acts of kindness and altruism. When we are curious about the lives and struggles of others, we are more likely to feel compassion and extend kindness. Studies show that empathy-driven behaviours, such as helping others, foster a sense of connection, purpose, and fulfilment, which in turn boosts our own well-being.
Practical Steps to Cultivate Curiosity and Open-mindedness
While curiosity is a natural trait, it can also be cultivated. Here are a few practical strategies:
1. Ask Open-ended Questions: In your conversations, practice asking questions that invite others to share more about themselves or their views. This fosters deeper connection and learning.
2. Embrace Mindfulness: Mindfulness encourages a “beginner’s mind,” a state of openness and freedom from preconceptions. By focusing on the present moment, we cultivate an ability to see things as if for the first time.
3. Challenge Assumptions: Make it a habit to notice and question your assumptions about others. Approach people and situations with a mindset of learning rather than judging.
4. Explore New Perspectives: Make time to read, listen to, or watch content that challenges your views. Exposure to diverse perspectives stimulates curiosity and increases empathy.
5. Reflect on Conversations: After a conversation, reflect on what you learned and how it expanded your perspective. This can help solidify the habit of approaching conversations with a desire to learn.
“I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious”
Albert Einstein